Key Concepts:

Vocabulary: abuse, domestic violence, spousal abuse, child abuse, neglect, elder abuse, cycle of violence, crisis center

 

 

 

Help for Families

Violence in Families

Main Idea: Violence in families can cause lasting harm.

All families have problems from time to time, and that’s normal. In most cases, families can work through their problems with the help of good communication and mutual support. However, some problems are too serious for family members to handle on their own. One of the most dangerous problems a family can face is abuse, the physical, mental, emotional, or sexual mistreatment of one person by another. When abuse results in acts of violence involving family members, it is called domestic violence. 

Spousal Abuse

Domestic violence or any other form of abuse directed at a spouse is called spousal abuse. This form of violence can occur in all kinds of families, regardless of income, ethnicity, or education level. Spousal abuse can involve physical or sexual violence as well as emotional abuse. Abusers may threaten or intimidate their victims and try to cut them off from family or friends.

Spousal abuse is a criminal act that can be prosecuted by law. However, this crime often goes unreported. Victims may blame themselves for their partners’ abusive behavior, thinking that they somehow deserve the mistreatment. They may also be unwilling to tear the family apart by leaving an abusive spouse. Many fear they will be unable to support themselves or their children if they leave. In some cases, the abuser may threaten to hurt or kill the victim or their children if the spouse attempts to leave.

Child Abuse

Child abuse is domestic abuse directed at a child. It includes any action that harms or threatens a child’s health and development. Like spousal abuse, child abuse can be physical, emotional, or sexual. Child abuse may also involve neglect, the failure to provide for a child’s basic needs. Neglected children may lack adequate food, clothing, shelter, or medical support. Leaving children alone and unsupervised for long periods of time is also a form of neglect.

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Parents who abuse their children don’t always want to hurt them. Sometimes they simply don’t know how to take care of children. Many abusive parents were abused themselves as children and don’t know any other way for a family to function. Alcohol and drug abuse also increase the risk of violence in the home. Whatever the reasons behind it, abusing a child is always unacceptable and dangerous.

Elder Abuse

Elder abuse, the abuse or neglect of older family members, is a growing problem that often goes unnoticed. Elder abuse can occur both within the family and in institutional settings such as nursing homes. Like children, older family members may suffer physical, emotional, and sexual abuse, as well as neglect. Elder abuse can also be financial. For instance, caregivers may take advantage of elders by manipulating or pressuring them into handing over control of their money and other assets.

Effects of Abuse

Victims of domestic abuse may suffer physical injuries, such as bruises, burns, or broken bones. In the worst cases, physical abuse can lead to permanent injury or death. For many victims, however, the emotional scars left by abuse last even longer than the physical injuries. Victims often experience feelings of shame and worthlessness. Abused children may be anxious or depressed and have difficulty in school. Without treatment, abused children often grow up to become abusers themselves. The pattern of repeating violent or abusive behaviors from one generation to the next is known as the cycle of violence.

Children who live in abusive homes may try to escape by running away. Others are thrown out of their homes by an abusive parent or guardian. Many runaways and “throwaways” end up living on the street or in the company of predatory adults. They are at risk for drug problems, crime, and continuing physical or sexual abuse.

To avoid these risks, children suffering abuse at home need to seek help from an adult they can trust, such as a relative, teacher, medical professional, or religious adviser. The police can also connect these teens with social services that can help them. Short-term shelters, for instance, can provide a safe place to stay. “Drop-in” services can provide food, clothing, medical attention, and crisis counseling.

Stopping Domestic Abuse

Stopping domestic violence depends on the three Rs: recognize, resist, and report. The first step is to recognize the problem. Victims and others need to be aware that child abuse and domestic violence are crimes. Any claim of abuse should be taken seriously, even if it sounds unbelievable.

Victims of domestic abuse can also resist their abusers. If someone tries to harm you, you can try to escape or to prevent the attack. Once you escape, seek help from a trusted adult.

However, resistance may not always be possible. That’s why reporting the abuse is the third step in putting a stop to it. If you or someone you know is being abused, report the problem to someone who can help you. Try talking to a trusted adult, such as a family member or a school nurse. You can also contact an abuse hotline or a crisis center. Finally, you can go directly to the police. The victim may also require counseling and medical care.

Victims of domestic violence need help. Their abusers need help, too. Through counseling and other strategies, they can learn to manage their feelings and break the cycle of violence.

Sources of Support

Main Idea: Communities offer many forms of support to families in crisis.

There are many community resources to help families deal with a variety of problems, including abuse. What type of help they need depends on the seriousness of the problem. Some problems, such as domestic violence, may require notifying the police. Others, such as substance abuse, may require medical help. Some sources of help for families facing difficulties include

  • family counseling services.
  • support groups.
  • community services, such as shelters or hotlines.
  • law enforcement officials.
  • hospitals or clinics.
  • faith communities.

Counseling

Family counseling is therapy to restore healthy relationships in a family. Families come in as a group to meet with a counselor, discuss their problems, and seek solutions. Counseling can help some families deal with changes such as separation or divorce. It can also help in cases when one member has a problem that affects the entire family. Such problems may include anger, depression, or substance abuse. Sometimes individual counseling is also beneficial.

Support Groups

A support group is several people who are all coping with the same problem. The group meets regularly to discuss their problems and get advice from each other. Support groups can help many people just by reassuring them that they are not alone. Figure 7.8 lists support groups that deal with various personal or family health issues.

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Community Services

Families seeking help may also turn to resources in their community. Troubled family members may seek help from a crisis center, a facility that offers advice and support to people dealing with personal emergencies. People might turn to a crisis center to help them get through problems such as substance abuse or domestic violence. Some communities also have crisis hotlines. These are special telephone numbers people can call to receive help 24 hours a day.

Communities also provide a variety of other services to families in need. For instance, public or private agencies may offer classes on parenting and conflict resolution. Social services can help provide food, clothing, shelter, and medical care. Public agencies can also help adults find a job or receive job training.

Finally, community services offer help for victims of domestic abuse. Social agencies can remove children from abusive homes and place them in foster care. Victims can also seek help by contacting an organization that deals with domestic violence. Many communities provide shelters where spouses and children can go to escape an abusive home. They may also help victims obtain counseling and legal services.